Pride and Shame

I am not proud of how I used to live, but I am not ashamed of it either. There is no one who can judge me any harsher than I have already judged myself.
I am who I am, as a direct result of the tragedies and triumphs that I have survived. I have made horrible choices, harming myself, those I love, as well as, unsuspecting innocent bystanders. I have done my best to heal those wounds and restore balance where I have lived in unacceptable extremes.
I am not afraid to let you see all of me, exactly who I am. I am not the greatest. I am not the worst. I am exactly as I was created to be at this moment.
I may be kind and loving, inspirational and positive. But I am also selfish, dishonest, resentful and afraid. I am more like you than I am different.
Today, I am responsible, accountable and I have more integrity than I have ever had in my life. My footsteps match my words. I own my choices…even the bad ones.
I am a man, a father, a son, a brother, an uncle, a friend and a human being. I have purpose and direction.
I am neither proud or ashamed. I just am.
~ S.D


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